Yesterday was almost a repeat of the day before. I took another trek to the grocery store. It is a good long walk and good for me. As usual I purchased too much and now my knuckles tend to drag on the ground. The grocery store is a magnet I cannot seem to avoid. I got mushrooms and dried baby lima beans and tomatoes and canned tomatoes and rice and yoghurt and heavy cream and quite a bit of other stuff. I will try to make the walk each day the the weather is nice.
Today will be pizza and Swedish meatballs and three layer chocolate mousse cake. Today will be mostly trying to figure out the new medical plan that I have to pick by Friday. I am leaning towards Bob's Health Plan and Excavation Supply Depot. Their motto is "If something goes wrong, we've got you covered.".
Saturday, October 31, 2009
Thursday, October 29, 2009
The Trek
Yesterday I went for a long, long, walk. The weather was so nice and I had something on my mind, so a long walk was called for.
First I trudged to CVS. It is about three miles to that. There were some things that I wanted to get there. Their spices are very inexpensive. It was not an inexpensive trip as there were some vitamin supplements that I wanted.
Secondly I went to the Post Office to get some stamps. I am tired of paying a zillion dollars for ten stamps at the convenience store.
Thirdly, the main reason for the walk occurred. I went to the grocery store, about two more miles. Why the grocery store? Yesterday morning I felt an urge to make Swedish Meatballs and try a new recipe for triple chocolate mousse cake. I overdid it a little as the bundles were a bit heavy walking back to where I live. It was more than worth the travail. It was a beautiful day and I needed to get out and have the dust blown off of me. The walk back from the grocery store is only about two miles as the entire trip is one big circle.
When I returned I reheated some chicken and tumeric and took a nice long nap after reading for a while. I am looking forward to another stroll today, as soon as the Sun comes up. There is still more chicken in the pot for when I return. Chicken, tumeric, tomatoes, olives, leek, garlic, onion, chicken broth, peas, broccoli, corn, and heavy cream make a nice dish, over a large amount of rice. Five drops of Tabasco make it just right. I weaken and add just a few drops of soy sauce. I know it is not good for me but it just seems right.
First I trudged to CVS. It is about three miles to that. There were some things that I wanted to get there. Their spices are very inexpensive. It was not an inexpensive trip as there were some vitamin supplements that I wanted.
Secondly I went to the Post Office to get some stamps. I am tired of paying a zillion dollars for ten stamps at the convenience store.
Thirdly, the main reason for the walk occurred. I went to the grocery store, about two more miles. Why the grocery store? Yesterday morning I felt an urge to make Swedish Meatballs and try a new recipe for triple chocolate mousse cake. I overdid it a little as the bundles were a bit heavy walking back to where I live. It was more than worth the travail. It was a beautiful day and I needed to get out and have the dust blown off of me. The walk back from the grocery store is only about two miles as the entire trip is one big circle.
When I returned I reheated some chicken and tumeric and took a nice long nap after reading for a while. I am looking forward to another stroll today, as soon as the Sun comes up. There is still more chicken in the pot for when I return. Chicken, tumeric, tomatoes, olives, leek, garlic, onion, chicken broth, peas, broccoli, corn, and heavy cream make a nice dish, over a large amount of rice. Five drops of Tabasco make it just right. I weaken and add just a few drops of soy sauce. I know it is not good for me but it just seems right.
Wednesday, October 28, 2009
Gentle people
Yesterday I went for a flu shot at the senior center in town. This is a small town and it is remarkable how many seniors there are in this town. As I was walking to the center, some lady that I don't even know stopped and asked me if I was going to the flu shot. I said yes and she told me to get in and she would give me a ride. I wonder if it was the grey hair and grey beard that tipped her off.
I am by nature overly garrulous and as we were waiting for the shots to begin, I struck up several conversations. Most of the people in this town were born here and have lived here all of their lives. We spoke of the things of value here and the opinions were remarkably uniform. The little market, the small stores, the library, and the fact that the teenagers are all nice and polite. It is a quiet place, sort of like a Brigadoon without the flashy pants. We recently got a barber shop and Wal-Mart closed its doors and moved to another town. There is a bookstore that is doing well and a store that sells nothing but hot dogs. There is no computer store and no restaurant chain. There are some of these stores but they are in a town to the North. There is a hardware store. It is not part of a chain but it has everything that a person would need.
Evidently the people here continue to deal with the stores that their parents dealt with. They realize that any money that goes to Benton, Arkansas will never return. It will not pay for their neighbor's heating oil or children's braces or weekly groceries. There is definitely a Quaker heritage going on here. The quiet enjoyment of the simple things of life and the concern for neighbors are apparent in everything here.
The town hall must be over a hundred years old. The police station and the fire headquarters are in that small town hall. All of these buildings are within two blocks of each other and the library. I have watched town meeting and see one philosophy in the meeting. "If it ain't broke, don't fix it.".
There is another gem across from the library, a doughnut shop that has cinnamon doughnuts
A good book, a cup of coffee, and a cinnamon doughnut. Simple things for a simple old man.
I am by nature overly garrulous and as we were waiting for the shots to begin, I struck up several conversations. Most of the people in this town were born here and have lived here all of their lives. We spoke of the things of value here and the opinions were remarkably uniform. The little market, the small stores, the library, and the fact that the teenagers are all nice and polite. It is a quiet place, sort of like a Brigadoon without the flashy pants. We recently got a barber shop and Wal-Mart closed its doors and moved to another town. There is a bookstore that is doing well and a store that sells nothing but hot dogs. There is no computer store and no restaurant chain. There are some of these stores but they are in a town to the North. There is a hardware store. It is not part of a chain but it has everything that a person would need.
Evidently the people here continue to deal with the stores that their parents dealt with. They realize that any money that goes to Benton, Arkansas will never return. It will not pay for their neighbor's heating oil or children's braces or weekly groceries. There is definitely a Quaker heritage going on here. The quiet enjoyment of the simple things of life and the concern for neighbors are apparent in everything here.
The town hall must be over a hundred years old. The police station and the fire headquarters are in that small town hall. All of these buildings are within two blocks of each other and the library. I have watched town meeting and see one philosophy in the meeting. "If it ain't broke, don't fix it.".
There is another gem across from the library, a doughnut shop that has cinnamon doughnuts
A good book, a cup of coffee, and a cinnamon doughnut. Simple things for a simple old man.
Monday, October 26, 2009
Seasoning
I am up very early. I usually get up around 2 A.M. but this morning I am up even earlier. I have already had eight hours of sleep as I went to bed while the Sun was still up. It was so pleasant to lie down in the warming Fall Sun. The good book that I have had a lot to do with the incentive to lie down.
Yesterday started with a trip to the library. A long walk followed. Gazing at the trees and the waterfall brought pleasing thoughts. The trees are still in most of their glory but the black veins and bones of their fingers are beginning to show as the wind is slowly stripping their hands of their bright orange and red of their leaves. It is like an old man's hands, the strength and sinew of youth slowly give way to the veins and knuckles of the denoument.
The season is slowly passing and it will be missed. It is the simplist of times. The scurry of Spring and the labor of Summer are gone and the enduring of Winter is ahead. It is a time for reflection and savoring the year. The air is so attuned to us that we can barely feel it. It is dry but the mist of the waterfall cures that. Only the squirrels are scurrying about as a stroll through town and the fallen leaves seems to leave their peace on the mind and the heart.
The afternoon was spent chickening. Chicken braised in broth then combined with tomatoes, corn, broccoli, onions, pepperoncini, peas, and my new favorite, tumeric. A can of cream of mushroom soup topped it off and the whole was ladled over rice. The tumeric puts the yellow back into the sauce and I am told that it is good for me. So a bellyfull of rice and chicken, the Sun streaming through the bedroom window, and a new adventure to turn the pages of, led to a very enjoyable afternoon and evening.
I am enjoying the simplicity and slowness of the way my life is now. There are concerns but there have always been concerns and they pale before the joy of being alive. In the past they roosted in my mind as it lay down on the pillow but now they have to find another place to roost as I savor the simple joy of a warm blanket in a cool room.
I am on a journey to an unknown destination but I no longer try to steer. I will just look out the window and enjoy the ride. I will accept what life puts on my plate. There will not be a Nobel Prize on the plate or a fascinating novel but there will be rice and chicken and a little tumeric.
Yesterday started with a trip to the library. A long walk followed. Gazing at the trees and the waterfall brought pleasing thoughts. The trees are still in most of their glory but the black veins and bones of their fingers are beginning to show as the wind is slowly stripping their hands of their bright orange and red of their leaves. It is like an old man's hands, the strength and sinew of youth slowly give way to the veins and knuckles of the denoument.
The season is slowly passing and it will be missed. It is the simplist of times. The scurry of Spring and the labor of Summer are gone and the enduring of Winter is ahead. It is a time for reflection and savoring the year. The air is so attuned to us that we can barely feel it. It is dry but the mist of the waterfall cures that. Only the squirrels are scurrying about as a stroll through town and the fallen leaves seems to leave their peace on the mind and the heart.
The afternoon was spent chickening. Chicken braised in broth then combined with tomatoes, corn, broccoli, onions, pepperoncini, peas, and my new favorite, tumeric. A can of cream of mushroom soup topped it off and the whole was ladled over rice. The tumeric puts the yellow back into the sauce and I am told that it is good for me. So a bellyfull of rice and chicken, the Sun streaming through the bedroom window, and a new adventure to turn the pages of, led to a very enjoyable afternoon and evening.
I am enjoying the simplicity and slowness of the way my life is now. There are concerns but there have always been concerns and they pale before the joy of being alive. In the past they roosted in my mind as it lay down on the pillow but now they have to find another place to roost as I savor the simple joy of a warm blanket in a cool room.
I am on a journey to an unknown destination but I no longer try to steer. I will just look out the window and enjoy the ride. I will accept what life puts on my plate. There will not be a Nobel Prize on the plate or a fascinating novel but there will be rice and chicken and a little tumeric.
Sunday, October 25, 2009
A child is ill
A child of the family is ill. All of the feeling of unfairness and not being able to understand rush back into mind from where they have been lurking. It brings old thoughts to mind.
I remember when mankind was able to go to the Moon. It was a very expensive journey and they didn't even bring back T-shirts. T-shirts that might have been able to clothe a child shivering in the night in one of Earth's backwaters. They took clean and pure water and air with them on the journey. I would wager that they didn't get the air and water from Mombasa or New York City. What about the cost of such a meaningless trip? How many innoculations or meals could have come from that cost? Is the government stealing our childrens lunch money?
Now there is a way to make automobile fuel from corn. It will result in even further savings because there will be no need to make trips to the grocery store because there will be no food there to purchase.
Somewhere in Somalia, a child went to bed last night without supper. Somewhere in America, a teenager was riding around in a Hummer fueled by corn. Both are children of the human family. Maybe we can spin mosquito netting from Moon rocks and a child in Burma will not get malaria.
Somewhere a child is ill and somewhere a child is hungry. Somewhere fuel from corn is going into a tank. Not a tank of a generator that will provide power for lighting for a school or power for a water purifier but the tank of the kind of tank that goes BOOM and RAT-TAT-TAT.
Somewhere a child of the human family is ill or hungry or cold. Somewhere derivatives have put health care for the poor on hold. Somewhere sagacious old men have decided that million dollar salaries and homes in the Hamptons are more important than a child with a fever. What if it was their child? I have news for them, it is their child. The family is not taking care of the children. SHAME, SHAME, SHAME on us. You can capitalize the us if you wish.
There is one small glimmer of hope. Bill and Melinda Gates are using part of their 401K to pay for mosquito netting and clean water and a cure for illness. So I nominate them for high office. Not President or King or Emperor but for the highest office imaginable. I nominate them for Parents of the human race!
When I was young my heart steered me towards socialism. When I got older my mind steered me towards capitalism. It is nice to know that the hand of the heart is back at the tiller. So I will make an attempt to feed the man's sheep.
I remember when mankind was able to go to the Moon. It was a very expensive journey and they didn't even bring back T-shirts. T-shirts that might have been able to clothe a child shivering in the night in one of Earth's backwaters. They took clean and pure water and air with them on the journey. I would wager that they didn't get the air and water from Mombasa or New York City. What about the cost of such a meaningless trip? How many innoculations or meals could have come from that cost? Is the government stealing our childrens lunch money?
Now there is a way to make automobile fuel from corn. It will result in even further savings because there will be no need to make trips to the grocery store because there will be no food there to purchase.
Somewhere in Somalia, a child went to bed last night without supper. Somewhere in America, a teenager was riding around in a Hummer fueled by corn. Both are children of the human family. Maybe we can spin mosquito netting from Moon rocks and a child in Burma will not get malaria.
Somewhere a child is ill and somewhere a child is hungry. Somewhere fuel from corn is going into a tank. Not a tank of a generator that will provide power for lighting for a school or power for a water purifier but the tank of the kind of tank that goes BOOM and RAT-TAT-TAT.
Somewhere a child of the human family is ill or hungry or cold. Somewhere derivatives have put health care for the poor on hold. Somewhere sagacious old men have decided that million dollar salaries and homes in the Hamptons are more important than a child with a fever. What if it was their child? I have news for them, it is their child. The family is not taking care of the children. SHAME, SHAME, SHAME on us. You can capitalize the us if you wish.
There is one small glimmer of hope. Bill and Melinda Gates are using part of their 401K to pay for mosquito netting and clean water and a cure for illness. So I nominate them for high office. Not President or King or Emperor but for the highest office imaginable. I nominate them for Parents of the human race!
When I was young my heart steered me towards socialism. When I got older my mind steered me towards capitalism. It is nice to know that the hand of the heart is back at the tiller. So I will make an attempt to feed the man's sheep.
Tuesday, October 20, 2009
Fall
It is Fall in New England. All the glories of the season are bursting out all over. The sugar maples are blazing with their reds and yellows and oranges and purples. The weather couldn't be more perfect. It is a little cool in the daytime but stop for a moment in a sheltered nook and the Sun warms your face and thoughts. The fallen leaves carpet the lawn but, huzzah, the lawn isn't mine and therefore neither are the leaves. It is the time of pancakes and sausage and maple syrup. It is also the time for tucking in the garden for its nap.
The garden that I have is in pots on the porch. Yesterday I attempted to clear it out but was restrained, restrained by the yellowjackets crawling among the leaves of the plants. The yellowjackets are a bit testy this time of year. The last time that I was stung I had quite a reaction to the sting and had to go to the hospital. The doctor told me to not get stung again as the next time could be even more serious. So I left the field to the victors and will clear the porch after we get a nice frost. All of the green tomatoes are sitting in a bowl on the counter and are embarrased to be inside. They must be embarrased because they are starting to blush.
The other fall is wending its way towards oblivion. Last night I was able to sleep in the bed. My side is still very tender but at least I don't have to live in fear of a yawn. It has been three weeks but soon it will be over. The last time that it happened it took about a month to heal. My boss had to tie my shoes for me as I could not bend over.
I have made a resolution to eat vegetables. Lately my diet has consisted of almost exclusively meat. Green leafy things are in the future. Each time I think of this situation I remember what my Brother once told me.
"Vegetables aren't food. Food eats vegetables. Don't eat anything that didn't have parents.".
Sitting here, thinking of this, I have suddenly developed a yearning for squash. This is a good time for squash in New England. Ummm, baked squash with butter and maple syrup and sausages! Maybe a little spinach and beet greens to go with it. I have some nice kielbasa to go with the greens. This will be a Fall to remember.
The garden that I have is in pots on the porch. Yesterday I attempted to clear it out but was restrained, restrained by the yellowjackets crawling among the leaves of the plants. The yellowjackets are a bit testy this time of year. The last time that I was stung I had quite a reaction to the sting and had to go to the hospital. The doctor told me to not get stung again as the next time could be even more serious. So I left the field to the victors and will clear the porch after we get a nice frost. All of the green tomatoes are sitting in a bowl on the counter and are embarrased to be inside. They must be embarrased because they are starting to blush.
The other fall is wending its way towards oblivion. Last night I was able to sleep in the bed. My side is still very tender but at least I don't have to live in fear of a yawn. It has been three weeks but soon it will be over. The last time that it happened it took about a month to heal. My boss had to tie my shoes for me as I could not bend over.
I have made a resolution to eat vegetables. Lately my diet has consisted of almost exclusively meat. Green leafy things are in the future. Each time I think of this situation I remember what my Brother once told me.
"Vegetables aren't food. Food eats vegetables. Don't eat anything that didn't have parents.".
Sitting here, thinking of this, I have suddenly developed a yearning for squash. This is a good time for squash in New England. Ummm, baked squash with butter and maple syrup and sausages! Maybe a little spinach and beet greens to go with it. I have some nice kielbasa to go with the greens. This will be a Fall to remember.
Sunday, October 11, 2009
Perfectly Porcine
A man was standing at a bus stop early on morning. As he was waiting he noticed another man coming his way, walking a pig on a leash. It was the ugliest pig that he had ever seen. The pig had gooey black stuff smeared all over parts of it, patches of scars and missing hair, and a wooden leg. The first man started chuckling at the sight.
The man with the pig stopped and said "What are you laughing at?".
The first man said "I was laughing at your ugly pig.".
The second man said "Hey, don't you laugh at this pig. This is a good pig. This pig made me rich. He was digging in the backyard and hit oil. That's where the gooey stuff came from.".
The first man said "That's all and well but what about the scars and missing hair?".
The second man said "Hey, this is a good pig! This pig saved my daughter's life. We had a fire at the house and when we got outside, we discovered that my daughter was missing. The pig ran back into the house and took her by the hand and led her outside. This is a good pig.".
The first man said "Sure, that's all well and good but what about the wooden leg?".
The second man said "Hey, this is a good pig! You don't eat him all at once.".
The man with the pig stopped and said "What are you laughing at?".
The first man said "I was laughing at your ugly pig.".
The second man said "Hey, don't you laugh at this pig. This is a good pig. This pig made me rich. He was digging in the backyard and hit oil. That's where the gooey stuff came from.".
The first man said "That's all and well but what about the scars and missing hair?".
The second man said "Hey, this is a good pig! This pig saved my daughter's life. We had a fire at the house and when we got outside, we discovered that my daughter was missing. The pig ran back into the house and took her by the hand and led her outside. This is a good pig.".
The first man said "Sure, that's all well and good but what about the wooden leg?".
The second man said "Hey, this is a good pig! You don't eat him all at once.".
No Change
Things don't seem to be getting any better. I have spent the last two nights on the couch and it is becoming increasingly more difficult to get a good night's sleep. I know that it is said that as you get older you heal more slowly but this is ridiculous. Today will be an indoor day, cook a little, read a little and nap a lot. It is difficult to stay inside when the weather is so perfect. The leaves are all changing color, the air is brisk with a little dampness, and the Sun is warming the sheltered spots. If I am ever introduced to the Queen, I will be introduced as Sir Napsalot.
Friday, October 9, 2009
Dreams
I spent the night on the couch last night. It seems to be the only place where I get enough back pressure to make sleep possible. I was surprised when I awakened that it was light in the room. I usually wake up around 2 A.M. but it was 7 A.M.. I had the strangest dream. It should have been terrifying but it was strangely comforting. I have many dreams and often wonder if there is meaning to them. Someone should produce a directory of dreams, for I think that we all have similar dreams and there may be common reasons for what we dream. I used to dream that I could fly and someone explained the reason to me. The reason must have been valid for I have no longer had that dream in many years and the reason disappeared many years ago.
There are also dreams that we have while we are awake. They are not really dreams, they are wishes. I have had such a dream since 1974. It has never materialized but there is still time. If it ever does my purpose in life will have been fulfilled and I can leave behind a legacy that will be worthwhile. It will not be a legacy to be proud of but it will at least be worthwhile.
I still have the dreams that I am late for work or AWOL from the Army. It is so comforting to wake up and realize that those nightmares are no longer valid. I used to work at a place where being late or being absent were just not tolerated and what I did in the Army meant that if you were gone 24 hours without leave, you were a deserter. It is bad, bad, bad, to be a deserter! I came close once and it was very scary. They explain the consequences to you and it is very, very, scary.
So, I will live with my daytime dream and wonder about the nightime dreams. Wonder, what a nice word. I have wondered about things since I was a small boy. I still wonder about things. Do trees have an awareness? I know that some of them are able to communicate with each other. If they do have an awareness, what goes through the awareness of a six thousand year old pine tree? Are trees the hairs of the Earth and therefore we are the creatures that live among the roots of hairs? Why do some birds have to work so hard just to travel a short distance while others float along through life? The floaters all seem to be predators. They don't scurry from cubicle to crubicle trying not to be noticed but sit in oak paneled rooms and enjoy the fruits of the winds, none of which come from their efforts, as they rise higher and higher. The scurryers and the floaters all eventually seek out the trees for some reason. Do they dream while they rest in the trees? Perhaps the Ents know. I wonder.
There are also dreams that we have while we are awake. They are not really dreams, they are wishes. I have had such a dream since 1974. It has never materialized but there is still time. If it ever does my purpose in life will have been fulfilled and I can leave behind a legacy that will be worthwhile. It will not be a legacy to be proud of but it will at least be worthwhile.
I still have the dreams that I am late for work or AWOL from the Army. It is so comforting to wake up and realize that those nightmares are no longer valid. I used to work at a place where being late or being absent were just not tolerated and what I did in the Army meant that if you were gone 24 hours without leave, you were a deserter. It is bad, bad, bad, to be a deserter! I came close once and it was very scary. They explain the consequences to you and it is very, very, scary.
So, I will live with my daytime dream and wonder about the nightime dreams. Wonder, what a nice word. I have wondered about things since I was a small boy. I still wonder about things. Do trees have an awareness? I know that some of them are able to communicate with each other. If they do have an awareness, what goes through the awareness of a six thousand year old pine tree? Are trees the hairs of the Earth and therefore we are the creatures that live among the roots of hairs? Why do some birds have to work so hard just to travel a short distance while others float along through life? The floaters all seem to be predators. They don't scurry from cubicle to crubicle trying not to be noticed but sit in oak paneled rooms and enjoy the fruits of the winds, none of which come from their efforts, as they rise higher and higher. The scurryers and the floaters all eventually seek out the trees for some reason. Do they dream while they rest in the trees? Perhaps the Ents know. I wonder.
Thursday, October 8, 2009
Stasis
I am in stasis. I try not to move or breathe too deeply. The rib is still floating around and is becoming worrisome. It announces its presence with the slightest awkward movement. Last night I slept sitting up on the couch as the added back support seems to help.
Yesterday I attempted a walk but have you ever noticed how many stairs there are in this world? They are a surmountable barrier but not an easily surmountable barrier.
So much for the whining of an old man coming to the end of his warrantee. This morning has the grey clouds of Fall drifting by. It is nice to finally be in the weather of Russian plays. I have never been a fan of blue skies and puffy clouds and gentle breezes. This is my kind of weather. It is time to sharpen up the swords, get out the longboat, and go and pillage England.
There is some kind of heritage at work here. When the Swedes came to this country, they could have gone anywhere. Florida or California or the Southwest. Where did they go? Minnesota and Maine and Washington state were their prefered destinations. Snow and dampness and big trees, skoal to you my brother and throw another ox on the spit. We will light a fire at each end of the longhouse and tell tales and recite poetry until the mead is exhausted. Live for today for the damp cold destination awaits.
Yesterday I attempted a walk but have you ever noticed how many stairs there are in this world? They are a surmountable barrier but not an easily surmountable barrier.
So much for the whining of an old man coming to the end of his warrantee. This morning has the grey clouds of Fall drifting by. It is nice to finally be in the weather of Russian plays. I have never been a fan of blue skies and puffy clouds and gentle breezes. This is my kind of weather. It is time to sharpen up the swords, get out the longboat, and go and pillage England.
There is some kind of heritage at work here. When the Swedes came to this country, they could have gone anywhere. Florida or California or the Southwest. Where did they go? Minnesota and Maine and Washington state were their prefered destinations. Snow and dampness and big trees, skoal to you my brother and throw another ox on the spit. We will light a fire at each end of the longhouse and tell tales and recite poetry until the mead is exhausted. Live for today for the damp cold destination awaits.
Monday, October 5, 2009
As usual
As usual the chili is not good. It is not terrible but it is not that good. I have to learn to follow the recipe and stop adding extra ingredients. I stopped taking the pills yesterday and was sorry for it this morning. I guess it is going to take a while longer. Thankfully I have enough of them to last for a while. Many thanks to my Brother!
I am looking forward to getting back to cleaning. It is getting close to the time when the house will be closed up for the Winter and the fragrances I have generated over the Spring and Summer are not that pleasant. I need a big bottle of Febreze and some Pine-Sol.
I am looking forward to getting back to cleaning. It is getting close to the time when the house will be closed up for the Winter and the fragrances I have generated over the Spring and Summer are not that pleasant. I need a big bottle of Febreze and some Pine-Sol.
Sunday, October 4, 2009
Simple things
I have just come through a very trying time. Coming through that time has led to a much appreciated re-evaluation of life. Over the past few months I have been wondering about happiness. Is happiness a state of bliss or just an absence of unhappiness? I think that I have an answer now. Happiness used to be a time gone past but never now. I think that was because I had too many things on my plate. If you have fifteen things that you judge your happiness by, one or two of them are bound to go awry and you will be unaware of the others. This attitude has come from a PBS show about happiness. The show said that the key to happiness is K.I.S.S.. Don't let the happiness of good health be offset by the fact that your socks are too tight. Pare down the list of things that make you happy to a few important ones and get rid of the rest. Basically what they said was that multi-tasking leads to depression and feelings of inadequacy and failure. At home or at work, it doesn't matter, keep it simple.
I was feeling lonely and unlucky. Then came the crucible. It is hard to be happy when you cannot straighten up without white-hot searing pain. That seems to have passed now and is just extremely uncomfortable. I realized this this morning when I was able to get out of bed without almost passing out. I sat on the edge of the bed thinking "Hey, this is pretty good.". So I began to take inventory. I could not have come through this without the aid and care of my Brother and Sister-in-Law. There goes the loneliness. Someone does care. I have enough food in the house to last me for some time. There goes my biggest worry. I will be able to cook decent meals. Here comes the happiness. I will be able to go for a walk. Now the happiness is rolling in. My children are all alive and turned into people it is really nice to know. How much happier could a father be?
So that is enough! So what if the soup I make tastes lousy. So what if the sink doesn't drain right and so what if I don't have total recall. So what if I cannot understand Hawking? At least I can sleep through the night without worrying about having to get up.
I think that happiness is making room for happiness. Eliminate most of the things that can go wrong and make room for happiness to bloom. Happiness is like an old quiet friend, who simply nods at your craziness and smiles at your mistakes. Happiness doesn't judge, it is just there if you take the time to notice it. Today I will make the meatballs or some chili. If it is chili, I will forego the beans in honor of my closest and dearest friend.
I was feeling lonely and unlucky. Then came the crucible. It is hard to be happy when you cannot straighten up without white-hot searing pain. That seems to have passed now and is just extremely uncomfortable. I realized this this morning when I was able to get out of bed without almost passing out. I sat on the edge of the bed thinking "Hey, this is pretty good.". So I began to take inventory. I could not have come through this without the aid and care of my Brother and Sister-in-Law. There goes the loneliness. Someone does care. I have enough food in the house to last me for some time. There goes my biggest worry. I will be able to cook decent meals. Here comes the happiness. I will be able to go for a walk. Now the happiness is rolling in. My children are all alive and turned into people it is really nice to know. How much happier could a father be?
So that is enough! So what if the soup I make tastes lousy. So what if the sink doesn't drain right and so what if I don't have total recall. So what if I cannot understand Hawking? At least I can sleep through the night without worrying about having to get up.
I think that happiness is making room for happiness. Eliminate most of the things that can go wrong and make room for happiness to bloom. Happiness is like an old quiet friend, who simply nods at your craziness and smiles at your mistakes. Happiness doesn't judge, it is just there if you take the time to notice it. Today I will make the meatballs or some chili. If it is chili, I will forego the beans in honor of my closest and dearest friend.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)